Chasing your Dreams!

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The idea for this post originally came to me the other day as I was watching a movie at home. It was about a girl who trains very hard and is a high-level gymnast. One day, she gets into a car accident and it’s like everything she worked for was for nothing- all her dreams were shattered.

It got me thinking, how hard are we willing to work in order to achieve our dreams? And why do we give up on them? Why do we leave our dreams to be just that- dreams?

As a wise person once said, never let it be said that to dream is a waste of one’s time. For dreams are our reality in waiting. In dreams, we plant the seeds of our future.

A dreamless life is a life devoid of opportunity and beautiful experiences. To dream is to open our hearts to new things and accept. To believe in a better tomorrow; a tomorrow where the unconquerable can be conquered. No dream is too big or too small.

I am a dreamer myself, and I firmly believe that dreams are the key to a better future. I’ll bring some reality into this and we’ll talk about disadvantaged communities, the power of the mind and dreaming a reality. At one point in your life, you’ve probably heard someone say that the key to discontinuing the cycle of poverty, for example, is Education. But where did that start? Yes, with a dream. At some point, someone must’ve sat down and thought, “Hey, despite my best efforts, my situation is the same. What can I do to change this?”.

And that, my friends, is where it all starts. We ask ourselves the necessary questions, and then we follow a plan. If that plan fails, we try again and again and again! We don’t give up because what we end up with eventually is worth it. We follow those dreams. We chase them, grip them. They cannot escape. We are a world of dreamers, you and me, and we create for ourselves a better future.

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DREAM ON DREAMERS!

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Let’s make a change: What do you know about objectification?

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 Tell me, when I say ‘objectification’, what is the first thought that comes to mind? 

Let me start off by clearing any misconceptions:

objectify

VERB

[WITH OBJECT]

1. Degrade to the status of a mere object.
‘a deeply sexist attitude that objectifies women’
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 The above is an exact definition from the English Oxford dictionary. In most cases, I’d probably say that yes, the issue is summed up pretty well but here’s a challenge for you: Can you identify an issue with this definition? If you can, good on you. I can guarantee that not everybody will. Now, you have a minute to think. Maybe you have a faint idea, maybe you’re on the same page as me, or maybe you’ve got no idea at all. Whatever the case may be, feel free to scroll down a bit. I’ll be talking further about this a little on in the post.
First, a little bit of background. This post was definitely unplanned, but it is an important issue that I’d like to further put out there. You’d think, being the society we are, living in this day and age, that we’d be more aware of what’s going on. What we put out. How we portray ourselves, what we say and do. The harsh, reality, however, is that many of us are still very much in the dark.  Every day, we act in ways that may be deemed unacceptable, and frankly, we are none the wiser. And here, I’ll bring in an example: President Donald Trump. He’s a bit of a hot topic, isn’t he? Sparked many debates. Let’s go back to the time that he made *that* remark about dating his daughter. Or joked about it. Always one to defend himself, even when he is clearly in the wrong. Or, we could go back to the various times he was a fat shamer. It’s widely known that Mr Trump is one for making many a sexist remark, but need I go on?
This kind of behaviour happens every day and is often overlooked. In fact, for me, I experienced this just yesterday. I was checking my social media when I received a message from a man who’d first started talking to me a few days earlier. I was wary of course, the dangers of talking to ‘strange men’ not lost on me. He was around his late forties, old enough to be my father. I had seen his profile. He posted pictures of his family, his wife, his kids. Just before I received his first message, I had commented on a photo. It started off innocent enough, we made small talk and I kept my wits about me. Then, he called me dear. I thought nothing of it, at the time, but that was probably his way of gauging how comfortable I was with what he had just called me. That is, in order to make further advances. Or potentially, step it back a notch. The next day, I received yet another message. He said the same things, asked me how I was, but then his next message: ‘How are you baby?’ ‘What’s going on baby?’ ‘What’s happening baby?’. It’s safe to say I was thoroughly disgusted. Even if I knew this person, he was not my age, and that, well, that made his comments even worse. I was shocked that he felt he could call me that and think he could get away with it. I then decided that I’d reply to the message, not mentioning what he’d called me. Sure enough, the next day, I received three messages with him calling me ‘baby’. By this time, I was well and ready to ask him how his WIFE and FAMILY were doing. And maybe even ask if he called his wife ‘baby’, because, heck, there’s another option. But why me? Maybe he was being innocent, but in my eyes, he had way overstepped the boundaries, and that was not okay. The bottom line is that name calling like this is becoming increasingly common everywhere, and sadly, is sometimes used in ways that intend to marginalise someone. Not everybody reacts the same way to being called different things, and so taking chances, in my opinion, isn’t something we should be doing anymore.
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Now, back to the little challenge I set for you. You may have noticed this: a deeply sexist attitude that objectifies women’. 

 The bolded words are key here.
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 In fact, this sentence in itself, is pretty sexist! Women, while we cop a fair share of crap, are not the only ones being objectified. Have we forgotten about the other half of the population too?
 Nobody escapes discrimination. Often enough, talent and hard work are sidelined because the focus is on one body part. This way, we don’t get to see the whole picture.  Don’t see people as beings with feelings, dreams, thoughts and aspirations.
Wake up society.
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Photoshopped flawless- Because that’s totally last season! 

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“The media can be a beautiful or tragic thing. Let’s celebrate body positivity; let’s be comfortable in our own skin. Let’s forget six packs and thighs gaps. We are ourselves and that’s not going to change no matter how hard we try to fit ourselves into the box society confines us to.”

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Anyone into magazines here?

With all the flashy covers and the must-read articles, the free giveaways and- okay, okay..!

The pages full of models who are clearly *slaying it* 💁👑

It’s well, hard not to be.

I’m guilty. I could stare at those glossy pages for hours, imagining myself as one of those models. They seem to have it all: The looks, the body, you name it.

The bottom line, eye candy, oh yes! But here’s the big question: What is the media doing regarding body positivity? This is 2017, and we are ready to see change.

It’s an honest known fact: Perfection, as is ‘attained’ by countless celebrities in magazines, movies and the like is, to put it bluntly, a big fat photoshopped lie.

And it’s so funny you know- There are so-called ‘standards’ for everything. People are expected to live up to those, or better still, exceed the expectations. A body to die for, swoon-worthy looks. All of that is great, but where do we, the general public, stand?

Let me define perfect for you:

Perfect; ‘Having all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or characteristics; as good as it is possible to be’. 

Synonyms: Ideal, model, without fault, flawless etc.

And there we are again, back to those words: Model=Flawless, right? That’s the magic combination. Put two together and boom, you’ve got perfection. 

And here’s something even funnier: We strive for something made up, something non-existent. We are not stupid; we know we cannot find ‘perfection’ so we create it. (Hello photoshop!)

We trick ourselves, and we try to trick the world. You’ve got the problem and we’ve got the *solution. 

Why are we living a lie? We are human, and say what you will, but we do not appreciate perfection. Why? Because it is unattainable, unrealistic and sets a standard that cannot be reached. Perfection is scary. We do not like immaculate airbrushed pictures. There needs to be a balance.

What’s beautiful is being body positive.

We should not be made to feel ashamed of being ourselves. And that’s why this made my day.

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What it means to love you.

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Love is a submission to pleasure

An inevitable pain

But you,

an unruly storm

left me waiting in vain,

Gone my fragility,

My psyche over-thrown

You were insane;

One of a few

Some say I became you;

Maybe this is all too true

With rue my heart is laden

You were no fair maiden

Killing the spring I bloom

A suffocating gloom you house

Seeping and infiltrating;

Like a deadly fume you lay my soul to rest

Forcing yourself to believe

This was who you are

And it;

it-

was for the best.

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