A few days ago I was asked by a friend If I felt like I’d drifted apart from people at my old school. I think she was surprised by my answer. The truth was that yes, of course I felt that way. In fact, I knew I had and I’d accepted it. I’d even drifted from her, a girl who used to be my best friend. Things change, people change- sometimes you don’t.
I’ve always been a very genuine person so when I feel a connection starting to fade, I know it’s not for lack of trying or effort. Relationships of any sort are important to me. I think to a degree if you don’t prioritise relationships, you also fail to prioritise people. If someone matters to me, they matter. Simple. While this isn’t the case for most of us, I know that some people find others disposable or replaceable. That kind of negative viewpoint can’t lead to anything good and definitely won’t foster any healthy or worthwhile relationships!
My aim is always to nurture connections with those I love. That means dedicating time to them and putting in what I also hope to receive back. This is another important point.. it takes two. If you find other people no longer reciprocate what you show them, it’s time to revaluate where you stand in that relationship. Sometimes that means cutting ties or just letting what is already happening carry out. Losing people is never easy, but I trust now that whoever is meant to be in my life will never stray too far. I can only control my actions, not those of others. That is surely a small comfort. Therefore, I need not bear the weight of all that could have been. It’s not up to me. What is yours will find you.. what is not yours cannot be kept. There will come a time when you won’t want it anyway. For the sake of self love, self respect, stepping away is sometimes the best thing. I no longer feel the need to suffer through small talk or force dead conversation.
This isn’t to say however that you shouldn’t try to reconnect with people if you feel you aren’t as close as you used to be. Sometimes it just takes one person overcoming a small fear they may have of seeming foolish for reaching out when it’s been a while. Other people you click with just like that. You talk almost on the daily and even when you don’t, the next time you catch up, nothing will have changed. They say you have many soulmates, most of them not even in the romantic sense. I’d say I have a few. It truly is the nicest thing.