The other day I asked my partner what expectations he had when we first came into our relationship and I loved his answers. Even though we don’t make a habit of talking about the past, preferring to discuss the present or what’s to come, we’ll occasionally fall on the topic. He said that he kept an open mind and didn’t think too much. He wanted to keep things simple. Basically, what will be, will be. Then he said that he recognised a need in the both of us and wanted a chance for us to be more than we currently were. He said that even if we didn’t work out, he wanted to leave me better than I was before. It was kind.
I got to thinking about those wise words and realised they deserved a post of their own. Why do we enter others’ lives and let people enter ours when there are no guarantees, no pre-written contracts to dictate what will or won’t happen? It’s for the cause of betterment.
It’s absolutely mind blowing, when you really think about it. Merely existing requires a whole new level of vulnerability, faith and a sense of the bigger picture at work. This is something we often don’t realise.
Now, as I sit here writing out this post, I’m considering all the ways in which my relationship with my partner has helped grow me as a person or awakened parts of me that were dormant. Over time, I learnt what good character looks like and was able to feel confident in who I choose to be with. This is something I struggle with. I’m not always the best judge of who people really are. As a side benefit, I was able to overcome trust issues I had. I no longer worry about whether I’ll wake up alone one morning because my partner is bored of me. I no longer assume the worst when a phone call isn’t picked up. This is my growth.. and it was a huge step for me.
These are the glorious, messy seasons of our lives. Sometimes people are brought to us and other times they are cleared from our paths. I’m learning to trust that I am given what I need and only that. The people who are meant to hear my story will always be around.